Day 321 – Running with Good Intentions
Just when I think I’ll never get another job.
Just when I think I’ll never meet another love.
Just when I think I’ll never get anywhere closer to the career of my dreams.
Just when I think I’ll never meditate again…
I get that phone call, that email, that contact, and I end up having to turn work down (madness, I know!).
I meet the man that makes me grin like a Cheshire cat in his perfection, who opens up my heart, and brings the true loving soul out from within that isn’t needy and desperate and clawing at any opportunity to be in a relationship (and I wonder to myself where that loving person has been all this time).
I start a course that I know will take me to new levels of writing I’ve only seen being awarded at the Oscars.
And, that last one…well, that make take a little more time…
As I’ve noted before, I’m seeing changes in myself. Some old. Some new. But changes none the less. Changes in which I may fixate on the negative, but can talk myself down off the ledge long before I find myself tiptoeing closer the edge. Changes in which I see all sides of the coin and I realize that it’s not about pulling on a fake grin, but simply in finding the inspiration that it’s only myself that can hold my dreams back. Changes in which I find myself opening up to the world around me in ways I never knew was possible, all because I was willing to open myself up to someone who cherished that vulnerability and gave it back to me in a stronger, fuller form.
It’s my first real day back blogging again and already the assignments and lack of time is piling up. I’m trying to sit with it and not panic about the fact that I made a commitment to myself to start this back up again until I am finished. It’s going to be a challenge, but it’s my intention. And as with all my intentions lately, my karma is reaping the benefits, and I can’t believe all the gifts life is offering up to me. I guess the only thing I can do with all this is grab on tight and run with it knowing I can only do my best, and for now that is good enough.