Day 329 – Sugar High, Unhappy Low
I thought I’d get back into exercise today after realizing that my poor sleeping patterns are related to my lack of exercise. I got changed and got jumping only a half an hour after eating nearly a whole packet of skittles and drinking 3/4 of a bottle of Dr. Pepper. Needless to say I had to stop about half way in for fear of throwing up.
This has never happened to me when exercising before, but then I had been taking much better care of myself when exercising in the past.
I did start yesterday cooking myself healthy and nutritious meals, but for some reason ended back in the snack aisle at the supermarket browsing for high-sugar snacks.
I’m going through a destructive phase in which I crave everything I ‘shouldn’t’ be eating. I’d love to sink my teeth into a juicy burger or devour a plate of cheesy Cheetos. But when I think about Earthlings and how bad I used to feel after eating dairy, I can’t bring myself to do it. So, instead I reach for the Skittles (my new sugary snack of choice) or a bag of Baked Lays and salsa.
I’m fighting myself. I’m fighting health. I’m fighting my cravings. I’m fighting myself when I give into my cravings and I’m doing everything I don’t want to be doing, even though I know it will bring me no happiness.
I’m a bit off course, as happens when I get emotional and fight against the present moment. I know I will get back on track again soon. It’s just going to take some time and acceptance.
In actual fact, maybe that’s the key. When I accept fully and truly what is going on in this present moment with myself then I can accept happiness for myself and stop all this insane sugar craving.
Whatever it is that’s causing this negative behavior, I’m the only one that can solve it for myself so it’s important I take the time to do what it takes to get back to happiness.
What do you do to get yourself back to happiness when you find yourself off track?